Whether it is road rage, a provoked emotional outpouring of anger, or losing your temper over something silly, every one of us have lost our tempers at one time or another. Anger management only becomes an issue when we are no longer able to control our anger, and have destructive outbursts. A destructive outburst does not necessarily mean that you have broken something, or physically hurt someone, as a manifestation of your anger, it just means that, because of your inability to control your angry responses to a real or perceived stimulus, you have done something harmful to someone, something, or even to yourself.
When your anger controls you, you may feel you are at the mercy of something that you can not control. Anger can cause you to do things you normally would never do, and even things you could regret for the rest of your life. Anger can even affect your physical well-being in more ways than one. Studies have shown that anger causes your heart rate and blood pressure to rise. Hormones, like adrenaline and noradrenalin, also rise when you are angry. Anger can push you backwards emotionally, into the cave men era, when the fight or flight response was the only way to stay alive in an uncivilized world, so not only does uncontrolled anger effect your life in the areas of your personal relationships with others, it effects you physically as well.
Anger management is a learned skill, so it’s more common in youngsters and teens, who have not learned good coping skills to deal with their anger. Should you feel you are at risk of losing your temper in a way that could harm you, or others, you should always seek professional help. Ask your parents, pastor, physician, school counselor, or a trusted, responsible friend for help.
The following is a list of suggestions for when you begin to feel your anger getting out of control.
1. Take a time out. Just take a break away from the object of your anger.
2. Beat a pillow or punching bag.
3. Draw or illustrate your feelings of anger.
4. Write about your feelings.
5. Run around the block, exercise, or do hard physical labor.
These may not be long term solutions, but can provide an opportunity for your initial feelings of rage a chance to cool, so you can think more logically about your options for anger management.
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