How to Handle Difficult People

A bully at your work is difficult for you to face. He is demanding you do part of his job without pay or credit. How do you handle it? Your neighbors are constantly fighting. They wake you up in the middle of the night with their screams and curses. What do you say to them? Your father is unhappy about your career choice. He constantly criticizes your work and points out what he thinks you should do. How do you deal with him? Difficult situations are part of everyone’s life. Employers and employees can’t get along. Partners clash over money. Spouses cannot resolve disagreements. If you ignore these situations, they always get worse. Employees get fired, partnerships and marriages break up, everyone is miserable. Waiting and worrying, the most common "solution," also allows the problem to get worse while giving you stress and shortening your life span.

"The Whole World Stinks!"

While Grandpa is taking a nap on the couch, his seven-year-old grandson gets some Limburger cheese from the refrigerator and smears it on Grandpa’s mustache.
When grandpa wakes up, he says, "This room stinks!" He goes to another room and says, "This room stinks." After walking throughout the house, he says, "The whole house stinks!"
Grandpa goes outside and takes a deep breath and says, "The whole world stinks!"
Your attitude about life does the same thing.
Examples1. Your marriage is not going well. You go to a movie and notice how nobody smiles. Couples seem to be bored with each other. The movie’s happy ending seems phony.
2. Someone’s nasty comment at work makes your head feel like exploding with anger. While driving home, everyone seems aggressive and rude. You drive like a dangerous, insane maniac. You think about gun ownership.

How to Reduce Anxiety

There has never been a better time for worry. We have problems everywhere with the Iraqi war, potential terrorism and an unstable economy.
According to the news, we are seeing more businesses closing down, more home foreclosures and more people going broke. They say we have less confidence and greater anxiety.
Add in work problems or marriage problems and you get ANXIETY.
SymptomsYou worry about everything, big things, little things, imaginary things
You are afraid of making mistakes
You find it hard to make decisions
You feel nervous for no reason
You feel dizzy or weak or tired
You imagine the worst
Your body is tense
You sleep poorly

Fishing Story

The Japanese love fresh fish. However, the waters close to Japan have not held many fish for decades. So to feed the Japanese population, fishing boats got bigger and went farther than ever. The farther the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring in the fish. If the return trip took more than a few days, the fish were not fresh. The Japanese did not like the taste. To solve this problem, fishing companies installed freezers on their boats. They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer.

When in Doubt, Communicate!

You may remember being told as a child, "Keep quiet!" "Children should be seen, not heard," and "You talk too much." You were a "good" kid if you kept quiet. However, being quiet when you are little causes big problems later in life.
As an adult, you may have been punished for communicating. For example, if you admit you committed a crime and are sorry about it, no one cares. You still go to jail. If you honestly tell your spouse you are thinking about an affair, your marriage suffers if your spouse is not very understanding. If you tell someone you feel a little crazy, who knows what might happen. So you learn to keep your mouth shut.

How to Kill the Green-eyed Monster

Nothing can ruin a relationship or marriage faster than jealously. Jealousy creates anxiety, anger, loneliness, hate, fear. No one thinks clearly when jealous.
Having a relationship with a jealous person is tough. The jealous person acts untrusting or unworthy. Jealousy makes the person unattractive, even repulsive.
No one wants a jealous mate and no one likes being jealous. So what causes jealousy?
"Jealousy is the largest factor in breaking up marriages. Jealousy comes about because of the insecurity of the jealous person and the jealousy may or may not have foundation. This person is afraid of hidden communication lines and will do anything to try to uncover them." — L. Ron Hubbard

How to Get Along with Your Spouse (and Others)

When your spouse does something wrong, how do you react?
Some spouses like to blame. "You really embarrassed me when you told that stupid joke. You make me want to stay at home."
Other spouses prefer to criticize. "You’re so fat it makes me sick."
Getting even is also a favorite response. "Well, because you were flirting with Chris, I decided to flirt with Pat."
By blaming, criticizing or getting even with your spouse, you are trying to be AT CAUSE by putting your spouse AT EFFECT. Unfortunately, putting your spouse AT EFFECT is harmful to your relationship. You start arguments and fights. Just because your parents reacted badly toward each other is no reason you need to continue the tradition.